The Weary Will of a Dreary Survival

Aren’t you tired of being invisible? 

Trying to make them laugh with you 

so that, they won’t notice how you’ve been miserable! 

Aren’t you tired of laughing at yourself? 

While you put away all your other needs, 

including both sex and intimacy, up on a dusty shelf!? 

Birthday Wish 2007...;)

Dear Goddess,

Chains

You said you wanted to make me your wife
you wanted me with you through the good times and the strife
then you held on to me tightly, almost as if I was your whole life
that’s when I realized; I could never be… your wife.
that’s when I realized; I wasn’t ready… for that kind of life.

The kind of life where my only job is to look pretty,
and yours is to provide for me and soon the to be born junior Berry,
is not the kind of life that was meant for me!

The kind of life where I’m to be arm candy,
while you get to do, and achieve and brag about the whole frenzy,
is not the kind of life at all suited for me!

Not Me

I’m not the girl you’ve been searching for.

My make is not perfect,

and it was not meant for show. 

I’m not the girl you’ve been searching for.

My legs are tired of running

and my optimism is running low.

My feet are swollen and my hands worn out,

My body was grossly misspent, right after you stormed out.

My eyes lost their fire, it just burned out.

My heart has been broken, too badly to ride it out. 

So you see,

I’m not her.

Yearning

Is this how I’m supposed to carry on,
Loving you, but in fear that I might let on?
Or in vain, hoping that you'll lead me on?
Is this how I’m supposed to go on,
Now that you finally decided to move on?

For years I waited,
Patiently, I just dated, killing time
so you could notice
that you and I, were always meant to be one.
Now it seems you’ve found “your one”
So I get to find out what happens,
When I a person’s lifelong dream is crushed, and gone.

Is this how I’m supposed to carry on,
Loving you, but in fear that I might let on?
Or in vain, hoping that you'll lead me on?
Is this how I’m supposed to go on,
Now that you finally decided to move on?

You weren’t my best friend,
But you were there whenever I needed one.

Bedding the Lion

Heart of gold, 

A thousand years old. 

Wisdom in her years, gained through wasted tears… 

Trying to overcome fears, 

Through fights to the death, gruesome and bloody 

Fully armed with defensive and emotional spears. 

She hustles her way past all the pretty pink ruffles 

And the supposedly “protective” tiny little bubbles 

Only to find shelter in the lion’s den. 

The lion studies her with care in his fierce eyes, 

More care than she’s felt in her many, long tides. 

So she goes to sleep peacefully, nestled in his embrace 

Knowing full well that by the next morning, 

He probably will have violently mauled her pretty little face. 

Still, it seems better when life is predictable, 

In the midst of all the cries and all the hate, 

It feels good for a moment, 

to believe she’s among the familiar, and that her heart is safe. 

That’s why she chooses to accept the lie, 

Knowing all along that it’s all fake. 

She goes to bed with the lion consciously, 

Because that way, she’ll know what and when to expect! 

Because that way she’ll know not to hope for love or respect!

Remedy

Eyes…
A pair of eyes is all it takes,
to heal the wounds of past mistakes.
A pair of eyes that raise the stakes
just by looking into your soul they’ll open its gates
to a wonderland bursting full of love
and its trusty partner: hope -out to graze.
A pair of eyes is all it takes,
to mend your broken heart
and fortify her blaze.