Buz Gibi

Öylesine soğumuş ki şu küskün kalbim,

Yarın aşk gelip çalsa, dostlarımın bile unuttuğu kapımı, 

Eritemeyecek, artık kök salmış buzlarımı, 

Görebiliyorum...

Hissetmek aşkı doya doya,

Bir nefes kadar yakınken bile,

Adeta Buzlar Kraliçesi gibi mantıklı, fakat yapayalnız,

Üşümekmiş benim kaderim,

Daha yeni yeni anlıyor,

Daha yeni yeni ağlıyorum...

Karanlığın Gölgesinde

Bazıları karanlıktan korkar... 

Karanlık çöktüğünde kalabalıkta kaybolmaktan, 

İsteyip de görünememekten...

Yıldızların loş parıltısı yetmez  

gürültülü gecelerini aydınlatmaya,

Tüm dikkatleri üzerlerine çekip,

Maskelerini parlatmaya...

Bazılarıysa alışır karanlığa zamanla...

Soğuk ve karlı bir gecede, 

battaniye misali sarmalayışına alışır.

Onlarıysa aydınlık korkutur ölesiye.

Karanlıkta kolaylıkla gizledikleri duygular

Aydınlığa boğulup bir bir ortaya dökülmesin diye

Ne bir mum yakarlar, ne de gece lambası...

Zifiri karanlık  gecelerde.

Ellerinden gelse gündüzleri bile 

Gecenin karanlığına boğarak yaşarlar.

Gözden hep uzak.

Sessizce.

Breakable

If ever given the choice,

Between breaking my heart,

And breaking my spirit,

Please just pick my heart,

For there's no doubt,

That of those two,

She's the only one,

That might survive it.

She's already a pro at healing...

Though battleworn and gun-shy

She still fights to keep feeling... 

Whereas my weary & tattered spirit,

feels more and more fragile 

with each unremarkable day that goes by.

More fragile and delicate 

than an antique porcelain doll... 

Too easy to break, 

and that much harder to fix.

"Dinsiz"

İnsanları sürekli birtakım kalıplara sığdırmaya uğraşırsanız onları asıl sizler bölmüş olursunuz, ne Tayyip Erdoğan'a ne "Occupy" ne de başka örgütlere gerek kalmaz bu durumda... Ben Ateist değilim.. fakat olabilirdim. Ateist olana da, Kabalist olana da saygım en az "Elhamdullillah Müslümanim" diyenlere olduğu kadar çoktur. Bu saygıyı da askıya almak zorunda kaldığım nokta ise beni kendi inançlarına çekmek için proproganda yapmaya başladıkları nokta olur. Bu hissim ne hristiyan, ne müslüman, ne putperest için değişmez. Ben senin inancına saygılı olmak için elimden geleni yaparım...

Ama sen bunu suistimal edip beni inanmadığım halde çarşaflara mahkum edeceksen, veya senin dininde et-balık vs. yemek yasak diye beni vejeteryan olmaya zorlayacaksan (bazı hindu dinlerinde sırf domuz değil, hayvan eti tümden yasaktır mesela), ya da "alkol, seks haram" deyip beni tadında keyif almayi bildiğim ve belki vazgeçmek istemeyeceğim hayatın bazı ufak tefek zevklerinden bir bir mahrum bırakacaksan o noktada sana olan saygımı kaybedersin... Çünkü haram dediğin de günah dediklerin de senin inancin. Benim değil.

Polis Yemini ironisi...

Yemin -shared on Youtube by Burak Kum (Kanka Film Yapim)


Bu video için yanlı diyenlere bir cevabım olacak...

Eksik bile olmus, polislerin marketlerin kapı ve camlarını tekmeleyerek indirdikleri, ev ve arabaların camlarını kırıp oradan içeri gaz attıkları görüntüler var.. Saf AKP'li de hala dine edilen küfür diye kuzu gibi meeee-liyor! Evet kardesim, ben dinsizim... ama 7-8 yasimdan sonra hayatimda kimseye dindar diye farkli davranip saygisizlik etmedim. O yaşlarda da tek yaptiğım Luna Park'taki simsiyah çarşaflı Kadınları görünce "karaböcek" diyerek çarpışan arabalarda onları hedef seçmekti.. Bu yaptığımdan gurur duymuyorum elbet, ama çocuktum, ve kendimden farklı olan beni korkuttuğu içindi tepkim.. tıpkı bugün sizlerin bizlerden korkusu gibi... 

Bu beni yetişkin yaşımda ayrımcı veya terörist yapmaya yeterliyse öyleyim kardeşim. Ama unutmayın ben korkularımı sizleri yakından tanımaya açık olmaya çalısıp, katılmasam da aşırı bulduğum inancınıza saygı göstermeyi öğrendim... Babamın cenazesinde istemesem de saygısızlık olmasın diye başımı bile örttüm, bana son derece ters ve saçma geldiği halde... Peki sizin toleransınız şimdi nerede? Başörtü takma hakkını demokrasi adı altında isterken eşitliğimizi savunan sizler, niçin bugün bizleri böcek gibi ilaçlarla yoketmeye, kaçırmaya, susturmaya çalışıyorsunuz?

Response to Fatma Aygun mentioned in a NY Times Article dated June 16th...

“This whole thing is not as bad as it looks,” Fatma Aygun, 33, said. “It is just a game of the foreign media.”

She added, “Things will be back to normal in three to four days. Taksim will look like this: happy, colorful and festive. We are the majority, and we will make sure of it.”

                                             The New York Times -Front Page Photo                                                                                                               

The New York Times Article From June 16th: Turkey Expands Violent Reaction to Street Unrest

*****************

REALLY FATMA? were you "present" during any of those protests? did you get to watch them from a nearby building? or did you get gassed for carrying a Turkish flag and hanging out at the park while the crowds sang songs? did the police attack you or kick you for having an opinion and not keeping it to yourself? did people who are not even police attack you with sticks, stones and knives, while many police officers just stood by and watched, glad someone was finally doing something violent to shut you up?

did you even watch any of the channels that showed what truly happens out on those streets, or look at some of the photos taken by protestors and/or onlookers that showed how viciously the police was attacking everyone? (you may have become the majority since after your "precious Prime Minister" told you to have 3 kids, your people who were already on the breeding-train probably started breeding like crazy, popping out anywhere from 3 to 10 kids per marriage, while the rest of the population mostly choses to only have as many kids as they can afford to decently and responsibly care for, in this day and age... but that's a whole other story and not worth getting in an argument over at this very moment...)

but even if you were/are the majority, that does not give you the right to trample over the rights of the rest of the population... or pretend that their grievances are not real and therefore can and should be ignored. This country was and always will be OURS, at least as much as it has been yours. You, do not have the right to exterminate us like you would mosquitos or vermin, with your endless supply of pepper spray, other gasses and water cannons that spray water diluted with unknown and hazardous chemicals... until we're too tired or scared or too broken to speak up. 

The Turkish government is ignoring and possibly even encouraging police brutality and "they" are keeping the truth about demonstrations from the Turkish people!!!

Please spread the word about what's going on here in Turkey... We need all the international news coverage we can get on this issue.. (twitter: #occupygezi...)

Just like I had last night, I thought I would try distributing masks (unfortunately not gas masks, but those bought from a hardware store) and water to the brave protesters walking and surviving along Barbaros Bulvari, Akaretler and in the roads that remained open in the direction of Taksim tonight. Police had shut down the main road with barricades and they were attacking the crowds with gas and gassed water in order to get them to scatter into less populated side-roads, where other cops dressed to blend in with civilians could also gas and trap them from both sides, so they would have nowhere to run… there were too many cops dressed as civilians in order to trick people to separate from the large groups possibly so they can be detained and beat up more easily and without witnesses. I witnessed one civilian cop step out of the dark blue car in front of me, open his trunk and start shooting with a gun that seemed to be loaded with gas. (The containers in the trunk were cylinder shaped and had light blue and orange stickers/packaging but I can’t say for certain if they were “Agent Orange” like some people have been saying it might be)

I had to sit there and watch him attack people, since he was blocking the road. When I grabbed my phone thinking I should at least get a picture of this, two uniformed officers that had at least 10 more (in close range) as back-up started hitting my car, signaling me to move along. Maybe they didn’t say “Don’t take photos, if you do you’ll be sorry” but their actions spoke volumes and I was too scared to even attempt to take those pictures I was contemplating…

Right in front of my eyes, cops that were conveniently protected with shields, and gas masks were forcing the large groups of protestors to scatter in all directions where other cops dressed like civilians helped trap them and keep them under fire from both directions… The only crime these kids had committed was to show up in Besiktas carrying Turkish flags while wearing masks to reduce exposure to the tear gas that has been fired almost non-stop over the last couple days. The sad thing is, I noticed that a lot of the street lights had been turned off, probably by the powers that be… so that our phone cameras won’t be able to capture most of what’s going on in the area… It seems they don’t want us to have proof of what the government is doing to its own citizens… They want to be able to say where’s your proof and since it’s too dark to capture anything without a professional camera and maybe even a camera crew and lights, the government thinks they can deny what’s happening. Please, lets all share our personal experiences with people that aren’t as familiar with social media. Let’s tell them what’s happening out there since our media refuses to. Lets have everyone talk about their personal experiences so our voices can be heard all over the world. Maybe then, “certain people” will finally understand HE CAN NOT SHUT US UP, HE WILL NOT SHUT US DOWN!

Berrak Bora

17

O gaz siktiklarin militan degil, terorrist de degil!

"Gelismis ulkeyiz biz de, Avrupa Birligi'ne uye olmak hakkimiz" diye ahkam keserdik bir zamanlar... Dunyanin hangi gelismis ulkesinde ulkenin kendi polisi kendi vatandasina bu kadar dusmanca saldirir? Hangi gelismis ulkede siyasetciler ciglik cigliga bagiran halkin seslerine kulaklarini bu kadar kallesce ve utanmazca tikamaya devam eder? Ortalik inledi "Tayyip istifa!" diye... serefli(!) basbakanimiz daha vatandasina ne bir aciklama yapti ne ozur diledi... Hos Reyhanli'dan sonra vicdani sizlamayanin bugun sizlamasini bekledigimiz icin bizler safiz belki de... Diktatorlerin bile eninde sonunda birilerine hesap vermek zorunda kaldiklari bir devirde yasiyoruz, hadi ondan korkmuyosun ove ove bitiremeyip bogazimiza tikamaya calistigin cok kiymetli Allah'indan da mi korkmazsin be adam?!... daha ne kadar bu milleti uyutmaya, uyutamadiginiysa susturmaya calisacaksin, hem de bu kadar hain ve yuzsuzce? Ben daha dogmamistim, buyurken dinledigim hikayeler yetiyor utandirmaya, icimi sizlatmaya ... Sen ki bu ulkenin gecmisini, darbeleri, vs. yasamis biri olarak bu manzaralardan hala mi utanmiyorsun? O gaz siktiklarin militan degil, terorrist de degil! Hepsi akli basinda insanlar... profesorunden tut doktoruna, sanatcisindan siyasetcisine, ogretmeninden ogrencisine Taksim'de sana DUR diye tek yurek ve tek ses olmus direniyorlar... Utan biraz artik! Lutfen bir yerlerden bir vicdan bul ve kullan ki UTAN!!

"Occupy Taksim" in the News...

https://twitter.com/search?q=%23occupytaksim&src=hash

Book Review: HDU by India Lee, A fun and sweet, if slightly(!) unrealistic smalltown goes hollywood(or in this case NYC) story.

Just like the Cinderella of this story Amanda, author India Lee has a fun, fresh and youthful voice in this story that takes a mostly average but fiercely loyal and unfairly treated smalltown girl through the adventure of her life as she concocts a crazy plan to become famous for nothing with the help of her virtual friend, fellow website moderator and undiscovered filmmaker friend Ian, that she just recently met after they've both had personal setbacks.

The story had fun twists and Amanda though sometimes frustrating (especially in how long it took her to figure out that the hollywood bad boy she loved to hate was in fact a stand up guy, and the one she lusted after -Dylan- was a spineless *ahem* f*cktard, or "douchelord" as Amanda once used to call her ironically charming leading man Liam... ) most of the time she is loveable, gullible, sweet and an amazing friend... I'm looking forward to the second book in which I'm hoping Ian finally gets clean and gets a happy ending of his own... and please make sure "the b/w itch" (you know who I mean) finally gets exposed for the sadistic and shallow monster she is... ( just remembered there are two of those in this story!) so I'm hoping to watch both of them fall from grace painfully while onlookers either cheer loudly or help the fall along with totally deserved punches and kicks to speed their just as well deserved downfalls in the upcoming second book. This one managed to entertain quite successfully... Let's hope the next one doesn't disappoint either!

İroni

Doğanın çok acımasız ve karanlık
bir espiri anlayışı olduğunu farkediyor insan
yılları yasadıkça, canı yandıkça, hayatı tanıdıkça...
Sevgiyi, sevmeyi gerçekten becerebilenler
nedense hep zamansız, erkenden ölüme,
bir türlü beceremeyenlerse,
çoğu zaman uzuuun uzun ve sevgisiz yaşamaya,
sonbaharda dökülen kurumuş yapraklar gibi cansız,
yapayalnız, fırtınalar koparken sağlı sollu, tutunacak dalsız,
her gün azar azar ölürken, veda edebilenleri imrenerek seyretme eziyetine mahkumlar...
Ne hikmetse...
Hayat bu, ironik işte böyle.
Cevabını bilebilecek birini bulursam günlerden birgün,
ona sormak istediğim tek bir soru var:
"Niye?"
-Tabi zahmet edip, dürüstçe bana cevabını verebilecekse...

Defiled

When a new place 
feels unclean or unsafe, 
you can always leave it 
and go somewhere else... 
To feel safe. 

When another person 
makes you feel unclean or unsafe, 
you can choose to stay away 
and feel safe once again... 

But when it's your own skin 
that feels unclean or unsafe, 
there is nowhere left to run or hide... 
No matter how many showers you take, 
or tears you shed, 
to wash away those stubborn stains... 

You'll always have the echos 
of memories left behind, 
haunting you, 
like faded or removed tattoos... 
that only you can see, 
because you still know,
where they used to be...

COMPLICATIONS

Why do our wishes and goals,
And the very occasional
answered prayers,
So often disappoint,
As soon as they're reached?

Why is it that life,
Just can't ever be peaceful?
And how come love,
Just never stays simple?

Book Review: Avoiding Responsibility, by K.A. Linde

Though not as powerful as the first book in the Avoiding Series (Avoiding Commitment), Avoiding Responsibility is a gripping continuation of Lexi's story. The book picks up around the time of Jack (the ultimate aSShole)'s bachelor party and other wedding related festivities, after Ramsey and Lexi have been together on an off for almost a year. The now familiar time jumps are still there, only now we're going back and forth between the present day and the first time Lexi met (but didn't remember meeting) Ramsey...

Book Review: Sins & Needles - Dark, action-packed and dangerously sexy...

Sins and Needles, by Karina Halle is a refreshing twist on the typical part adult romance, part bdsm stories we're so used to reading lately, where only the hero or the heroine is broken... you know those stories where one is innocent and wide-eyed beyond belief and full of compassion while trying to help heal the other... the broken one. Here, we have two severely broken leads, (three, if we count Ellie's dangerous and volatile ex, who's always present somewhere in the back of our minds, throughout the story/chase) 

Okuze ot da versen orkide de versen yapmayi tek bildigi sey cigneyip gevis getirmek!!!

"Pes! Mes! ... Kalibimi basarim bizim yobazlarin "tahrik edici" diye adlandiracagi ve tartismasiz elestirecegi hatta Cehennem'i reva gorecek kadar tepkili karsilayacaklari, o kadar ciplakliga ragmen, daha nadir tecavuz/kadina siddet olaylarina rastlaniyodur Fransizlarin bu sehrinde... Okuze ot da versen orkide de versen yapmayi tek bildigi sey cigneyip gevis getirmek... bizim memleketin okuzden bozma adamlarina da ciplaklik var burada dedigin anda akillari otomatik olarak sadece seks ve cinsellige gidiyor... Hos, ciplakligin sozunu etmeden onlerine cirkin olmayan herhangi bir kadin koydugunda da akillari oraya ucuveriyor, ya neyse... Sanki insanoglunun isterik hayvanlardan farkli olabilmesinin tek yolu giyinmek ve ortunmekten geciyor ve bu durumda irade denen seyin hayatlarimizda hicbir fonksiyonu yok!!!

Yani cirilciplak gezinmek ilk bakista cok normal olmayabilir ama kadinin yok omzu, yok saci, yok kasi, burnu, tirnaginin kosesi derken her bokundan tahrik olmak mi daha garip, oteki mi dersen bence hic tartismasiz bizimkiler cok daha hastalikli ve icten ice curuk bir bakisa sahipler!"

 

Haberturk: Dünyanın en çıplak kenti!

(Cap d'Agde)

On Rape and Bob Beckel...

I've been reading some blog posts in response to Bob Beckel's comments on rape and the more I read the more disappointed I get... It's infuriating how clueless and cruel people can be when they think they personally aren't affected by a certain issue... do people really think that all rape victims(survivors) are or should be brave and/or emotionally strong enough to report what happens to them as soon as it happens? Do you honestly think you could "always" tell if someone you know had been raped at one point in her life?... I admit, it may sometimes feel like a scarlet A, but the truth is unless they/we want you to know about something so private, you could never guess, because often the first thing we learn to do afterwards is how to hide those scars. Because rape survivors/victims are generally conditioned and taught to blame themselves for the attack (unless someone with better understanding of the issue reminds them not to...), more often than not they will be ashamed and try to forget and bury the whole thing, pretend it never happened....

The 10 Minutes From Dreaming to Awake...

For 10 minutes today, I didn't remember you were gone, and no longer just a phone call away... For 10 minutes I was able to imagine maybe having a wedding day someday... For just 10 minutes I was whole again, feeling warm and cherished the way I had all my life, being your little girl. As the fog of sleep slowly lifted, and reality started seeping in, I got the strongest urge to call you, just to hear your voice and make sure you weren't mad at me for somethIng since you hadn't called in a while, only to remember you couldn't pick up. You could only watch over me from far, far away... where I couldn't see or feel you. And all I had left of you were a few photos and childhood videos, old T-shirts that I often sleep in and the memory of once upon a time, feeling truly loved. I miss you...

The Love Letter

"The Love Letter ;)

Leaving You...

I didn't leave because you made me cry
And i didnt leave without a good reason why...
It wasn't about falling in and out of love,
And it wasn't about loyalty getting shoved.

Now and Then

Those who come before,
pillage and plunder,
creating scars that never truly heal.
And then...
Those who come after,
often pay the price when, in vain
they try to help you deal
with the endless residual pain
that renders you so numb, you can hardly feel.

Book Review: Wallbanger, by Alice Clayton

If all you need is a side of steam with your good laugh, Wallbanger, by Alice Clayton will definitely do!

Click to purchase on Amazon

snippet

‎It's either me or that damn dog/cat... You can't have both!" ... said the typically dense and stupid guy, as if he could ever have stood any chance against the cutest and most cuddly ball of fur on the planet?!... For the millionth time over the past couple weeks, she sighed inwardly, wondering if men would ever learn to compromise and maybe pick their battles?

A Magical New Year's...

An explosion of colorful fireworks celebrated the invasion of 2012 by 2013 as many people celebrated the arrival of hope along with the new year.